FOOD FRIDAY: Food in review
Indignity Vol. 4, No. 228
FOOD FRIDAY DEP'T.
Joe's Year of Delightful Eating
WOW, WHAT A year, eh? Today is Food Friday here at Indignity, and we decided to round up some food from 2024. I don't know about you, but it seems like I ate something every day this year, for which I give thanks!
Here are some breakfasts I enjoyed. For starts, there is a donut shop I visited in North Carolina called Duck Donuts, and I had a wacky item called "Bacon in the Sun," which had bacon, maple icing, and a salted caramel drizzle. I would never in my regular existence eat a bacon maple caramel donut, but I was on vacation. It was outstanding, as were the three other donuts I glommed: Chocolate Caramel Crunch, a plain Dunkin' Donut-type donut but way better, and another one that I think was apple cider and cinnamon, but I can't remember because it was my fourth donut and it's all a blur. The Duck Donut site has franchising opportunities, and I'm no financial advisor, but this place has bangin' sinkers.
At home, I love eggs, and I was really proud of myself for making a nice regulation-looking cheese omelette, which is gonna taste fine even if you can't get it flipped properly, but I nailed it, and the other day I made some fried eggs that looked like a yin/yang symbol and I feel like that was auspicious or something.
I went to the Auto Show in New York City back in May, and we stopped at a diner, where I enjoyed a kinda perfect BLT on rye, and a coffee, and the reason diner coffee is great is because they refill you as many times as you want.
Speaking of NYC, I received a lovely gift of a box of VESELKA, which is a great Ukrainian restaurant in the East Village, and it featured their borscht, pierogies, and some containers of onion-glumph to saute along with the pierogies, ohh, so good. Cook 'em low and slow, but not slow enough to caramelize those onions!
Back home, I made turkey meatloaf, and I did a round mounded one and a square flat one, and they were both delish, and I glazed 'em with straight ketchup.
I can't even tell you how many times I had pizza in 2024, but they were all pizza, which means they were all good, in all their forms. I have to note that the frozen Celeste pizzas at the grocery store are only good if you can get them for a buck each.
Much in the manner of pizza, damn near everything I grilled on my grill this year has been incredible, even vegetables! This photo was from a particularly good day where we had chicken, burgers, vegetable burgers, ribs, and zucchini & onions.
I went to a lot of baseball games this year and it's always better if I can stop by the Italian deli and score a nice sub to bring in and save a few dollars over the baseball park food, which to me is annoying, the waiting, the prices, the food, never a great experience. If your local sports-place lets you, always BYO sandwich!
This year was also great for some fancy dining, and my highlights are the oysters Rockefeller I got at a local steakhouse, and a Peking Duck that I enjoyed at a "contemporary" Chinese restaurant. I don't know if I was enjoying the Peking duck correctly, but my default move is to take a taco-type approach.
There is a place near my house where I enjoy a burger, and no matter what kind of year I'm having, it never disappoints; a solid pub burger, always a delight, and whenever I am around Upstate New York, I am comforted by hotdogs with sauce and onions. It's hard to see in the picture, but there are hotdogs under all that sauce. And onions. Yum.
I was pleasantly surprised this year by a grilled cheese sandwich that I enjoyed at the nearby anarcho-commie-pinko bookstore, cafe, and community event-space collective. It was a vegan grilled cheez, but I never woulda known, just a light and tasty sandwich grilled on a panini press, perfect, and it was four bucks! Remember, All Power To The People. The photo on the right is not a thing I ate, but I would have if I could have. It is a seasonal item, the Wawa Gobbler Bowl, which is being displayed in the photo by a guy in the parking lot where I get together with people every once in a while to drink outdoor beers.
Beers! I think my favorite is a beer in a frosted mug, and 2024 was a good year for those. I can't remember what the first one was, but Shiner Bock goes great in a frosty mug, as does Zadie's, and super-throwback Miller Genuine Draft, I can't believe they still make it!
I also enjoy the darker beers, and I had some nice ones this year, Kalamazoo Stout, Guilford Hall Brewery Conspiracy (a dark lager, who knew?), Ministry of Brewing 9.9 Problems, and, not a dark beer, but not a light one, a red one, Smithwick's Red Ale.
My 2024 was not all beers, though, there were some surprises. For instance, a friend at a family gathering turned me on to this rum, Ernest Hemingway Papa's Pilar, which is giving tourist-trap, there's so much stuff going on, Ernest Hemingway, barrels and casks and stuff, but it was nice neat, there's so much going on it's like a pre-made mixed drink. I do not know anything about rum, and yes, I know what happened to Ernest Hemingway.
The other surprise was a hiccup cure I was introduced to at a bar/grill near my house. You take some slices of lemon, squeeze 'em into a glass, throw the lemons in there, douse with bitters and then drink the juice. Miracle cure!
Snacks were also important this year. I still think Cheez-Its are a top-drawer snack cracker, even though I think they are thinner than they used to be. Shrinkflation!
What really blew my snackhole this year are Dots Pretzels, holy moley.
Also 2024 will forever be my Year of the Whirley Pop, it is my favorite way to make perfect popcorn.
And my big Home Economy discovery was the store brand tortilla chips!
What a year of food! And drink! I know the pictures don't show a lot of healthier choices, but I eat salad almost every day, honest I do, and fruit, but it's kinda boring, just fruit, and I don't have dessert a lot, but when I did this year, the memorable moment was blueberry pie for my birthday.
CORRESPONDENCE DEP'T.
REGARDING PROTOSE, AN ingredient listed frequently in our latest presentation of sandwiches from Hygienic Cook Book: A Collection of Choice Recipes Carefully Tested, by Jacob Arnbrecht, published in 1914 and available at archive.org, an Indignity reader writes:
What is it and what can I substitute for it? Any ideas?
—Jeff
We didn't have any luck finding anyone who sells Protose, but we found a lot of recipes using Protose, and this helpful history from Adam Shprintzen.
Meat substitutes marked a turn for the vegetarian movement at the start of the 20th century, one that led to a depoliticization for a whole generation of vegetarians. Protose—the name mashes together the word protein and the suffix -ose, or full of—was the most popular and enduring meat substitute crafted in the experimental kitchen at the Battle Creek Sanitarium (or San), the Michigan health resort operated by John Harvey Kellogg from 1876 to 1943. Promoted as a versatile meat alternative, Protose could be eaten as an entrée like a beef steak, on a sandwich for a light lunch, or as a roast to be carved ceremonially. The product was served to San visitors, marketed via mail order, and available at local grocers. The marketing of fake meats in early-20th-century America represented a transformation from vegetarianism’s radical, 19th-century political past into a community of individualistic consumers looking to produce healthy, economically productive bodies and minds.
As far as how to make Protose, here's a recipe from 2010,
JohnP
Here's another recipe from someone planning a Road to Wellville party.
Sarah Lohman
If Jeff or anyone else decides to make some Protose, please let us know and send pictures! Indignity values your correspondence. Email us any time you'd like at indignity@indignity.net.
Previously in FOOD FRIDAY.
WEATHER REVIEWS
New York City, December 26, 2024
★★★ Little white clouds crowded densely together, leaving an irregular network of blue behind them. The snow packed into ice on the sidewalk descending toward the Park was still solid and slick underfoot, and snow still coated the horizontal surfaces of the rising rock face at the Park's edge. The streets were still sparsely populated, disproportionately by people who had no choice. A man stood at the head of the big subway entrance at Columbus Circle, wearing a plastic garbage bag as outerwear and holding plastic shopping bags. The midday light was filtered into slight unreality. Once again the clouds cleared away in the afternoon; by sunset, the sky was clear, with the blend of pink and blue in the east looking at first like an ominous gray.
EASY LISTENING DEP'T.
HERE IS TODAY'S Indignity Morning Podcast.
Tom Scocca
Click on this box to find the Indignity Morning Podcast archive.
TOM SCOCCA
ADVICE DEP'T.
GOT SOMETHING YOU need to justify to yourself, or to the world at large? Other columnists are here to judge you, but The Sophist is here to tell you why you’re right. Direct your questions to The Sophist, at indignity@indignity.net, and get the answers you want.
SANDWICH RECIPES DEP'T.
WE PRESENT INSTRUCTIONS in aid of the assembly of sandwiches selected from Institution Recipes For Use In Schools, Colleges, Hospitals And Other Institutions, by Emma Smedley, Director of Public School Luncheons, Philadelphia, Pa.; Formerly Instructor in Domestic Science, Drexel Institute, Philadelphia, Pa.; Instructor in Dietetics, The Johns Hopkins Hospital Training School for Nurses, Baltimore, Md, published in 1919 and available at archive.org for the delectation of all.
Club Sandwiches
(50 Sandwiches)
2 1/2 pounds cold roast chicken
1 1/2 pounds cold, boiled ham
1 pound bacon
5 heads lettuce
1 quart Mayonnaise
100 slices toast
Spread a slice of bread with mayonnaise and cover with lettuce. Arrange on lettuce a slice of chicken, boiled ham, and bacon, which has been cooked until crisp and brown. Cover with lettuce and another slice of bread spread with mayonnaise.
Calories in recipe 4,290 protein, 24,567 total
Calories in one sandwich: 86 protein, 491 total
If you decide to prepare and attempt to enjoy a sandwich inspired by this offering, be sure to send a picture to indignity@indignity.net.
